11.3.10

[pieces in place, steady the pace]

life is going pretty swimmingly as of late. i'm finally financially independent for one, which really feels better than i thought...less arguements with my parents are always a plus! also, Portland is pretty much all set-leaving late april and i cannot wait to live with one of my best friends. durango was just eating at me...the weather, the people, knowing what i had in LA and feeling totally stuck. i barely leave the house when i'm not at work, and if i do, i'm not really wandering around town. i THOUGHT this was the sure fire way to avoid any and all contrived drama, but the last week has proven wrong. normally i would try to confront the problem and fix it or something, but the part of me that even gives a shit is just not there. AND THAT FEELS NICE. i am sorry, but i have a low tolerance for bull-shit, especially when it plays out in such a petty way. i laugh, rather than letting my stomach get in knots. i have some wonderful people in my life, and i'd rather focus on them, than ones that linger and feed off misery. turning the negatives into positives, blah blah blah.

i really am anticipating what Portland has in store. i don't see myself living there for more than a few years at most, but for the time being, i'm going to enjoy it. there's some endeavors that i'm really serious about embarking on, and i'm on pins and needles waiting for the time when i can really put my time and energy into it.
i'm missing LA so much though. my friends, the buzz of the city, even the smoggy glow...but i'll be back one day.

for now, i'm taking things in stride, and have my mind set on goals that i know will benefit me in the best of ways. i get such satisfaction making choices that are shaping my future, and no one can fuck with that.

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